Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Self, Meet Self

I've been working hard lately to become friends with someone I've known for a long time.
Not really my emotional self and I are ancient friends. Old friends of the 'finish each others' sentences' variety. We've ridden life's roller coaster together, hold nothing back, keep no secrets. My spiritual self and I have grown very close these last years. There's been much wrestling and struggling, doubting and believing. We're in sync.
The self I'm working hard to befriend of late is my physical self.
The most elusive.
The least understood.
The most feared.
The least cared for....
the least cared for of all of my selves.

So, I ask myself. When I want to nurture a friendship, what do I do?

I take steps towards the other. I move out of my comfort zone. Initiate.
I open my eyes. Watch closely. Learn.
I extend my hand. Reach out. Give of myself. Offer good gifts.
And, more than anything else...I listen.
Nothing pulls me closer to another than listening closely to all that they have to share.

So that's what I'm trying. Especially the listening. The learning and the listening. It's a very strange reality to recognize that I've spent most of my life living as a stranger in my own body. Acting like it really didn't belong to me. Afraid it was ultimately stronger than I was. And certainly not caring for it like I could have.

I've been told I'm a very good, very loyal friend.  I sure do try to be. I believe the day will come when self - physical self - will wake up, look at me in the mirror, and thank me for being that good, loyal friend. I'm looking forward to the day when this new and promising friend will have turned into one of the known and precious variety.

Today I gave myself the gift of green. Lots of smmmoooooth green.
And physical self was quite pleased with me!
I think we'll hang out again soon.

{Smoothie Recipe Here}

Joining friends for


  1. I know the struggle. I have it to. Right now we're working on being friends, too. That smoothy looks delicious!!

  2. THis is absolutely beautiful. Healthy friendships start with healthy friendships with ourselves. We are the key to our own happiness and we as individuals need nurturing.
    I love all of this.

  3. Your montage of photos is awesome and befriending yourself ~ mind, body, spirit is so wonderful ~ I work on that one daily ~ not easy sometimes ~ I can be my own worst enemy ~ Be gentle with you ~ You are precious ~ a child of the universe ~ thanks, xoxo

    artmusedog and carol (A Creative Harbor)

  4. What a wonderfully expressed piece of writing. I know just what you are saying and I think that deep down, most of us, if honest, have struggled to accept ourselves. I'm so glad you are on this journey of friendship.

  5. I love the way this is expressed. I need to work on the relationship with my physical self as well, we probably all could.

  6. I love this Adrienne! You are giving yourself the best gift - you! And it will keep on giving, I assure you.

  7. Green smoothies are so delicious! And, what a great way to start the journey of meeting self! Your post was courageous and honest. Loved it!

  8. I agree, it is important to love and accept yourself. Lovely post today. Stopping by from mama kats kelley at the road goes ever ever on

  9. Hi Adreinne,
    Your body collage is interesting. And a little startling. Because so often, that's how I see Myself. I examine PARTS out of context with the WHOLE. Hummm...

  10. you are so beautiful, i fear you will never know what that really means!!!

    if you struggle so hard with the outside it may make the inside feel differently....your hugs may not be as warm....and you may find wrinkle where you don't want them!!

    you are a lil like cotton candy, very sweet, a lil fluffy!! ;)

  11. Very intriguing post, Adrienne. I know the struggle very well, going through ups and downs with my physical self perception :)
    I loooove green smoothies. Discovered them a while back and now I have them every morning and miss them when I cannot - they are so yummy! And good :)

  12. This is such a tricky relationship because sometimes I SWEAR my body is really telling me it would be happy with milkshakes around the clock. It's not always easy to treat it the way it should be treated!

  13. I enjoyed your post! This is becoming an issue for me, as well. It seems like in the last year or so I've started to notice... changes. It's like they're coming out of thin air. I'm hoping to keep seeing my physical self as a friend.