Giving ~ Day 3

"I confessed that I had a burning desire to be excellent, but no faith that I could be. Martha said to me, very quietly: There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost.
The world will not have it.

It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open.”

Martha Graham to Agnes De Mille

Don't you love it when positive, life-affirming thoughts appear on your Facebook feed? Yesterday morning this quote was among the first to appear to me...and I have to say that it both stirred me and stuck with me through the day. {Thanks, Sean}

I confess that, in this era of self-promotion, I tend to be an if-you-build-it-they-will-come kinda gal. The notion of openness ~ of tuning out the noise and tuning into my inner voice ~ resonates deeply. things get confusing from there ... Because when I put myself 'out there' the insecurities take over. I begin to ask if anything that I say or do or write or create is needed in the vast, roaring ocean of ALL that is available from ALL over the world and ALL sorts of people ... when that question, the question of my worth or value, becomes louder than the urges, the notions, the beautiful ideas that motivate me ... when that bully that calls herself "comparison" taunts me in the schoolyard ... well, then I retreat. I sit back. I hold back. And I atrophy just a tiny bit. 

Yesterday's walk in the woods reminded me, yet again, of that often quoted notion that leaves grow old so beautifully. Their aging is so full of light and color! The older I get, the more I'm inspire by this vision of aging! And, though the leaves create a glorious scene when dancing together, it is ~ perhaps ~ each unique, individual leaf that most captures my attention. 

So, I will blog and write and post and photograph and open my home and craft ~ because this is how my energy most fully expresses itself. I will keep myself open...and I might even try to believe in myself.



From this morning's journal:

Give Away: Today I listen for the word "should" ~ and with each should I give away the notion of obligation and take a moment to question myself. Is there a way to turn the "should" into a choice, the "must dos" into opportunities? Some shoulds might be able to be discarded ... I imagine most are simply calling for a mind change. A perspective change. Today I give away the thought that anything in my life is a "have to."

Give Access: Today I give myself access to rest. Early to bed. My body told me first thing this morning that it was craving more rest. I will listen.

Give Thanks: Today I am grateful for healing. Emotional and physical healing. I'm grateful for the caregivers ~ for those who inspire physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual growth. I am grateful for healing.

Joining Tamar and Kat